FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

http://sports.espn.go.com/mlb/news/story?id=4394074

Jonathan Papelbon is a fucking idiot

Remember this from the All Star game last year?

Now, this happens. How can you be so fucking stupid? Who gave you the right?

He can die in a fire with teammate Dustin Pedroia.

ESPN is fucking stupid

Apparently for over 1/2 an hour last night, ESPN.com was reporting that Manny Ramirez and the Dodgers had agreed to terms, while ESPNews reported that this news had yet to be confirmed.

Ed. note: ESPN.com is now reporting this again, only this time it's confirmed by the Dodgers' official website.

David Ortiz is a bitch

David Ortiz has now missed spring training for the second day in a row due to a sore left shoulder.

But here's the clincher:

Red Sox manager Terry Francona says Friday that Ortiz is much better than Thursday, when he slept on the shoulder awkwardly. Francona says Ortiz also is feeling the effects from throwing during fielding practice earlier in the week.

What the hell?

Junior Griffey a Mariner

Ken Griffey Jr. has signed a 1 year, $2MM deal to return to the Seattle Mariners, where he began his career. He put up some great numbers with the M's, possibly the best of which coming in 1997 and 1998. Let's look at these stats:

1997: .304 BA, 56 HR, 147 RBI, 185 H, 34 2B,
3 3B, 121 SO, 76 BB, 125 R
1998: .284 BA, 56 HR, 146 RBI, 180 H, 33 2B,
3 3B, 121 SO, 76 BB, 120 R

Tell me your mind isn't blown by their similarity, and I'll call you a liar and set your pants on fire.

I'm really disappointed he was so injury-plagued as a Red; maybe he would be on the verge of passing Bonds so we could have a non-controversial all-time home run king.


Source: baseball-reference.com

Another reason why Dustin Pedroia should die in a fire

I think I speak for everyone here when I say we fucking hate it how everyone slobs Dustin Pedroia's nob. Oh, he's 5'8", he's scrappy. .326, 17 HR, 83 RBI? Big fucking deal, pretty pedestrian numbers if you ask me. What about .304, 32, 130? Or .292, 37, 127? Or what about one of two guys with 35+ HR, 100+RBI, and an OPS of .965? The point is I fucking hate whoever voted for him.

Anyway, I just found out that his brother was arrested "on two counts of oral copulation and lewd acts with a child under the age of 14". Which I find incredibly hilarious.

Die in a fire, Pedroia brothers.

Dodgers try to get better, older

In recent signing news, the Dodgers signed both Randy Wolf, who will likely join the rotation at #4, and Jeff Weaver (pictured above), who will compete against the likes of Shawn Estes and Jason Schmidt for the #5 spot. Apparently, the Dodgers' free agent pitching scouting only extends along the West Coast, since these guys have played for Seattle, San Francisco, and San Diego. Hell, next they'll probably fire up the game tapes from 2001-2004 and sign Mark Mulder.